I must confess, today was particularly trying.
Most if not all the kids started to bicker around me while I was in a rush to prepare breakfast. The bickering went on for the rest of the day. I lost count of the arguments which transpired among the kids. By mid afternoon, I was exhausted. Mentally, physically, emotionally.
Everything softens during quiet time. I took my nap with Anton.
Only to wake up to see the boys’ room in total disarray without any sight of the boys. I soon found out that they were trying to sow baby wipes across the garden. I don’t know where they get such ideas.
My husband reached home with a madwoman in the house. Scary.
I asked God where is He in all these mess? Where was He when my children were misbehaving?
He said He was in the noise and chaos of my children. He is in the midst of everything that is happening. He knows that I am having a difficult time and it is during these times that I can grow exponentially in patience and humility. I cannot rest in my laurel and be led to believe that life will always be smooth, that I am a self sufficient mother. I cannot expect my children to behave like mature 20 year-olds.
We have to lovingly embrace our days as God gives it not as how we want it to be. We all need grace. We all need God.
Tomorrow is Friday, end of the week. I will attend the monthly recollection.
I will begin again.